Trusting Jack (MC Securities Book 1) Page 9
Jack held him tight and buried his face in his neck and they swayed in time with the music. Michael closed his eyes as a wave of unadulterated need shook him. He wanted Jack so badly. Wanted him naked in his arms, wanted to be naked in Jack’s arms. Wanted to kiss every inch of his skin, care for him. Pleasure him. Make sure nothing could ever hurt him again.
He trembled with the promise contained in the embrace. Jack rubbed his face against him, cat-like, and ran his hands over his back.
The air shifted. It went from warm and cosy to taught and crackling in seconds. Michael’s heart hammered.
Jack seemingly felt it too because he moaned and squeezed him tighter.
Holding Jack was unlike anything he’d ever felt in his life. He was unlike anything or anyone he’d ever come across and the emotions that fizzed through him were deeply unfamiliar, but addictive.
He pulled back, so he could see Jack’s face. See if he was affected as badly. Needed to know he was affected as badly.
He brushed away the lock of hair that had fallen on Jack’s face with fingers that shook.
“I want to kiss you,” Michael whispered, wishing he could think of something romantic to say.
Jack’s pupils were blown, his cheeks flushed. He swallowed and closed the gap between them, touching his lips to Michael’s.
Michael hesitated, his breath catching at the whisper softness of his mouth, the touch of his breath against his cheek, the scent that was pure Jack. Heart hammering, he kissed him back, gently at first, but then Jack moaned and opened his mouth, inviting him in.
Michael sank into the single-most perfect kiss of his life.
Jack held the back of Michael’s head with one hand, touched his face with the other, and Michael moaned into his mouth. They kissed for an eternity. Kissed until Michael was lost.
Jack pulled away, breathing heavily. “I want to thank you.” His voice barely a whisper against his ear.
It took a moment for the words to register with Michael.
To work out what he was saying.
But when he did, something cold settled in the pit of Michael’s stomach. He wanted to beg him to stop talking, but his throat was too full. He went to pull away shaking his head, but Jack pressed a finger to his lips.
“Don’t worry,” he said, notes of panic in his voice, “it’s no-strings, just like we said. I’m not going to turn into a stalker.”
“Jack…”
“Shhh.” Jack ran his hands down Michael’s back, making him shiver, but Michael took hold of them and brought them forward. He held them tight and as he did so, Jack looked pained.
“Michael, please…” He moved as if to kiss him, but Michael moved his mouth, as much as he wanted his kiss, wanted Jack more than he could ever say, he didn’t want it as some kind of payment for bailing him out, for giving him some nice things, and certainly not for buying a fucking Christmas tree. If he were ever to kiss him, it needed to be because Jack wanted it as much as he did.
“Jack…” He tried to find words to explain how he felt. It was hard, because he wasn’t sure how he felt, and words never came when he needed them.
“I’m still your boss.” He fell back on something safe. Something unequivocal.
Jack seemed to slump in his arms. He pulled away. “If you don’t want me, all you have to do is say so. You don’t need to make excuses.” He went to pick up the unused tinsel and stuff it back into a bag. He methodically cleaned the debris.
Michael watched him. Stunned.
“It’s not an excuse. It’s the truth.”
“Yeah, right.”
Michael screwed his eyes shut and then opened them. “Jack. I’ve already told you I want you. I’ve told you that you don’t need to sleep with me to carry on staying here. I don’t know what else to say. If we do sleep together, I want it to be because you want me as much as I want you, not because you feel that you owe me. Yes, I’m using the boss thing as an excuse. Because the truth is a bit hard if I’m honest. I don’t want sex as a thank you for getting a bloody tree.”
Michael ran his hands through his hair and tried to stop shaking.
Jack watched him warily. “Maybe you should just think of it as fucking. Sleeping together sounds like…more.”
Michael screwed his eyes closed for a moment before replying. Before laying his entire fucking heart on the line and trusting Jack with it.
“That’s just the point.” He looked at Jack for a moment but had to look away. “I don’t want just fucking. I don’t want sex as a thank you. I want more. More.”
Jack looked shaken for a moment, but then something firmed in his gaze. He squared his shoulders. “Truth?”
Michael nodded. He had a feeling he wasn’t going to like what was coming.
Jack licked his lips, and scratched the back of his neck, and took a deep breath as though what he was about to say was difficult.
Michael braced himself.
“I want you so fucking bad. From the moment I walked through the door for the interview, I was… it was … just… bam.” He threw his hands in the air. “It was, I don’t know, insta-lust. I didn’t even know if you were gay. I still don’t. All I knew was I wanted you more than I’ve ever wanted anyone. No-one has ever made the bottom drop out of my stomach, or my skin prickle like you do, and it happens every time I see you. When you offered me a job…” He shrugged. “It was like an answer to my prayers. The fact that you give the staff free tea and biscuits helped me more than you’ll know. I was living rough, eating your biscuits for breakfast and lunch, somewhere warm and somewhere I got to ogle you all day and dream.” He looked so wistful for a moment. Michael was stunned and trying to keep up.
“When you came to the bedsit and sorted Bryce…” He smiled as though recalling the moment. “You were my hero. You still are. I said that stuff about no strings because I thought that was the only chance I’d have with you. Usually, I am a no-strings person. But with you?” He laughed awkwardly, then faced him again. “You can have all the strings you want. I offered myself as a thank-you because I thought that was probably the only way I might be able to persuade you I’m not pathetically clingy and desperate as well as a total fucking loser.”
Michael’s head was spinning. “You thought that showing me that you wanted me would push me away?”
“Showing you how bloody needy I can be might.” A sad, resigned look settled on his features. “I know I’ve been clingy. I’m sorry.”
“What the hell are you on about?” Michael was genuinely confused now. What the fuck did he mean, clingy and needy? “You’re the least clingy, needy person I’ve ever met in my whole life. You are so damned independent, you couldn’t even admit to wanting me without wrapping it up in some…farce about ‘no strings.’ You’ve survived things that would have finished me off years ago. You are not clingy. At all.” Michael wanted to wrap him up in his arms. “And, you’re not a loser. Anything but.”
Jack shrugged sadly. “See? I’m fucking useless at relationships too. Gav was right.”
“Gav? Your ex? What the hell has he to do with anything?”
Jack shrugged. “He tried to tell me I was too much, but I thought I was just being…loving.”
A few things skittered into place in Michael’s head. Jack had lived an insecure life. He was bound to have major trust issues and it was definitely easier to be brash and suggest a no-strings fling as thanks, but offering something more substantial would be hard. If his idiot ex had berated him for being ‘clingy’ then his view of how relationships might work could well be off balance. The thing he kept going back to was Jack’s admission that he had wanted him from the start. He’d said he made the bottom drop out of his stomach, and his skin prickle. That was exactly how he felt.
“Okay.” Michael put his hands on his hips and stared at the floor a moment. He trusted what Jack was saying. Could understand it. He was probably being over sensitive because of his own past.
He sighed and looked up at Jack. He was so
damned gorgeous. “How about we start again?”
Jack looked cautiously hopeful. He nodded.
Michael held out a hand, and Jack slid his into it. He could feel him trembling. He pulled him close, close enough that he could feel the warmth from his body, smell the soft scent of his skin.
“Where were we,” he whispered, and sought Jack’s lips with his own.
Chapter Ten
Jack’s heart was hammering so hard he wondered if Michael might be able to hear it. It was like something out of a fucking fairy tale! Soft strains of all his favourite Christmas tunes, a massive tree, warm, safe, and the most gorgeous man he had ever met in his entire life wanted him, and not in a no-strings kind of way.
Wanted. Him.
And he didn’t think he was clingy. Or a loser.
He moved closer, holding Michael’s outstretched hand. Michael pulled him closer, and slowly, oh, so slowly, like something out of a fifties film, bent so his could press his lips gently against Jack’s. His eyes fluttered closed as they kissed softly. Jack could feel the warmth of Michael’s breath, the softness of his lips, taste the minty chocolate they had eaten, and the tremor in his hands as he stroked Jack’s back. He was as deeply affected as Jack was.
Heat spread through Jack as their lips parted. Jack’s eyes stayed closed as he tried to breathe. They moved closer together, more by feel than anything, and Michael slid his lips over Jack’s again as his arms closed around him in an almost crushing embrace, and Jack groaned, loudly into Michael’s mouth, and the kiss deepened. Everything Jack thought he knew about kissing flew out of the window as Michael’s mouth opened with his and they just kissed. Wide, aching, desperate kissing, each trying to get closer, each trying to absorb the other. It was like no other kiss he had known. Nobody kissed like Michael Cross, nobody.
Michael’s hands went into Jack’s hair and gripped tight. He held his head as they kissed. Jack’s hands dropped to his waist, then to his arse as he pulled him closer. He could feel the aching length of his erection as they rocked against each other, as the wild, desperate kiss went on and on. Jack pulled up Michael’s sweatshirt and slid his hands under, so he could feel the warmth of the bare skin of his back, Michael’s hands came out of Jack’s hair and clutched at his jumper, pulling it up over his head. They stood apart for a moment, panting, Jack’s naked torso felt so sensitive to every whisper of air in the room his nipples tightened, and he shivered. Michael pulled off his own jumper and Jack moved forward to touch, but Michael’s hands went to the belt of his jeans and Jack froze. He wanted to see. Wanted to see so badly.
Michael undid the belt, flipped open the button, then slid the zipper down slowly. Jack couldn’t move or breathe.
“Christ.” Michael’s voice was a hoarse whisper. “When you look at me like that…”
He pushed down the jeans, taking his boxers with them, and stood. Naked. Magnificent. Dark hair dusted his chest, his goody trail, his thighs…
Jack moaned and dropped to his knees in front of him. He ran his hands up Michael’s legs, caressed his arse, then took his cock deep into his mouth. He moaned and sucked. He felt the shudder that ran through Michael’s whole body. He ran his tongue around the head, and Michael’s legs trembled as he gasped. He threaded his fingers through Jack’s hair, held him firm, and rocked a little into his mouth. Jack’s heart beat almost out of his chest. This was where he wanted to be.
Michael caressed his head more with trembling hands, then and pulled Jack’s head off him.
“Enough. It will all be over if you keep doing that.”
Jack didn’t want this to be over. Ever. He stood and stroked Michael’s face and watched as his lips parted, and his eyes closed. He kissed him, and Michael pulled him into his arms and took control of the kiss. Jack melted. Utterly. He gave himself up. Michael surrounded him. Engulfed him. The smell of his hair, his skin, the softness of his breath…it was like home.
Michael made short work of Jack’s jeans and they fell in a hot tangle onto the sofa, Michael pressing him into the cushions. Jack wrapped his legs around his hips and thrust up, desperately seeking friction. Michael shifted so their cocks were pressing against each other and started a slow thrust against him, all the while kissing him, making love to his mouth, holding onto his head… Jack moaned, pushing up against him and grabbing his backside, holding him where he needed him. There were so many things he wanted to do with Michael, but as they thrust together harder and faster, he knew this wasn’t going to last. He was lost. Utterly lost. The way Michael’s muscles tensed under his hands as he tore his mouth away told him he was on the edge too.
“Jack.” His voice was a tortured gasp as he ground hard against him. Jack wrapped himself around him, loving the weight of him, loving the heat of his skin, loving the way he moaned and thrust against him. He made the world go away until there was nothing left but the two of them.
Jack’s orgasm tore through him, leaving him crying aloud and grasping any part of Michael that he could. Michael shouted and rutted hard and they clung desperately, as the storm engulfed them.
Michael buried his face in Jack’s neck and Jack let his fingers drift up and down Michael’s back as they returned to earth. Jack had never felt safer. He kissed the side of Michael’s head, and received a soft kiss to the neck in return. Jack waited for him to pull away, but Michael didn’t. Waited for him to roll off and fall asleep, but he didn’t. Michael stayed in his arms. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d held someone important. Someone who meant something to him. Couldn’t think of anyone who had mattered as much as Michael.
“Am I too heavy?” Michael whispered after a few moments.
“Not at all.” Jack tightened his grip. He wasn’t ready to let him go just yet.
When Michael lifted his head, Jack held his breath and kept his eyes closed. He didn’t want to look up and see regret.
“Hey.” Michael’s voice was soft.
“What.”
“Look at me?”
Jack peeled one eye open and saw nothing but warmth. Michael’s brown eyes were beautiful. Sometimes you could read the world in them. Others, not a thing. But now, here, in the light of the Christmas tree, he saw nothing but warmth. He let go of the breath he’d been holding and smiled up at him.
“What?” Michael’s voice held the suggestion of a smile.
“Nothing. I was worried you might be regretting it.”
“Are you?”
“Um…no. Not a bit.”
Michael leaned down and kissed him softly. “Neither am I.”
Jack couldn’t stop the grin that spread across his face. He wiggled his hips against him suggestively.
Michael groaned and huffed out a soft, tired laugh. “You’ll be lucky, you’ve killed me.” He leaned down and kissed him again and Jack sighed.
“I should get off you and shower.” Michael kept nibbling at Jack’s lips as he spoke, fingers tracing a gentle pattern on the skin of his hip.
“We could shower together?” Jack’s heart beat fast as he waited for his answer.
“Together?” A slow smile spread over Michael’s face. “I’ve never showered with anyone before.”
“Really?” Jack shook his head. “Then let’s get that sorted out, my little shower virgin. I’d love to be your first.”
Michael laughed and captured his lips again in a warm kiss that was more about affection than lust. It did something strange to Jack’s insides.
“Come on then,” Michael said, rolling off him with a groan, then staggering to his feet and holding out a hand.
Jack grinned up and allowed himself to be pulled up. They were sticky and sweaty, but they made it to the shower without messing up the furniture.
Michael turned on the shower and held his hand under it until it was warm. He got out towels, smelly stuff, and fussed about awkwardly for a moment with his back to him.
“Are you okay with this?” Jack said.
Michael turned, and his smile was shy. “Very okay
.”
Jack grinned widely and moved towards him. “Come on, you need cleaning up thoroughly.”
Michael shuddered and moved into the shower and under the spray. The walk-in cubicle was big enough for two, and the water seemed to come from all angles. Michael tugged Jack under the spray, squirted shower gel into his palms, and then proceeded to wash him, covering every inch. It was absolute heaven. Michael even washed his hair for him and by the time he’d finished, Jack was rock-hard again and moaning. Michael handed him the bottle with a grin, and Jack returned the favour, washing him all over, lingering over his arse, sliding soapy fingers down his crack making Michael groan, then attending to his cock which was now hard as well. He pumped it up and down as he rinsed the soap from it, making Michael slap his hands against the tiled wall as if he was struggling to keep balance.
Jack sank to his knees and looked up, blinking in the spray. It felt so right to be with him. So wonderfully right. Michael gasped and took hold of his head, rubbing his thumbs against his cheekbones.
“I want to taste you again,” he murmured as Michael’s fingers drifted over his lips.
“You don’t have to.”
“Are you kidding me? I’ve been dreaming about sucking you for a lifetime. Once was never going to be enough.”
Michael’s eyes glittered. His lashes were clumped together by the water. “I’ve been dreaming of you for a lifetime.” His words were the barest whisper.
Jack smiled, blinked away the water, then took hold of Michael’s hard cock and swallowed him down. He felt the tremor that ran through Michael’s entire body. In moments, he was groaning and pushing at Jack’s head, but Jack held on tight, sucked harder, used every trick he’d ever learned. Michael just moaned the whole time and cupped his face, making him feel precious.
He went to push Jack’s head away as his thrusts became urgent, but Jack held on to his backside and took him deep as Michael cried out, his entire body tensing. Jack swallowed him lovingly, lapped up everything, then kissed the sensitive tip. Michael slumped against the shower stall, panting, eyes closed. Jack stood and stripped the water from his face before reaching out and shutting off the spray, immediately missing the warm, wet, steamy cocoon that had wrapped around them and wondering if he should have left it. Wondered if this would pull Michael out of his trance.